Q. bob had 93 chocolate bars and ate 74 what does he have now? A. diabetes

What do you call something green and fuzzy? Grass, I lied about the fuziness.

How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

whats the hardest part about eating a vegitable getting your mouth around the wheelchair.

i'm not random but cheese does get a bit purple if you leave it in your laptop then the battery dies and the sun expands and kills every dodo alive even though they're extinct but that not the point

roses are red, violets are fine, you be the six, and I'll be the nine.

Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

why did hellen kellers dog run away? because if your name was awughunguh you'd run too.

How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

What does a handsome guy and an ugly girl have in common? Nothing

Why did it take so long to find Osama Bin Laden? No idea. Bad military tactics. Was he found?

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't.

why did the man choke at the lunch table. Police there is a banana attacking me what should I do?

A pope meets another one

what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

troll lololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol.olo90ololol.o.ool.olololol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.o.o.lol.ol.ol.ol.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did the man cry? Because his mom died in a terrible car accident.

Why is it okay to have four cats? Because I said so.

The bartender says "We don't serve time travellers here". Two time travellers walk into a bar.

How did the guy survive the plane crash? He didnt, He died like everybody else.

I AM SHOWERING IN THE BLOOD AND ORGANS OF ENDORPHIN RUSH IN ORDER TO APPEASE THE GODS KNOWN AS... ME, MYSELF, AND I!

What's sad about four children going over a cliff in a car ? Four children just went over a cliff in a car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...