theres a fat guy

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Me: so Megan did it hurt Megan fox: did what hurt? Me: when ur aged face wasn't good enough for the new transformers movie?

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What does the time bomb say to the idiot? Nothing, time bombs are inanimate objects and therefore can't speak.

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A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

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Roses are red, Violet are blue. I just thought I'd let you know, But don't worry- this isn't a poem.

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Q: How many babies does it take th paint a barn? A: I dunno, how hard are you throwing them?

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RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES

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Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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a 12 year old walks into a bar she orders a drink and dies she then walks out of the bar

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A kid is Jackin off and his dad walks in and says if you keep jackin off you will loose your sight. the kid says dad im over here.

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There once was a girl from Nantucket, I've heard its nice there this time of year.

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How do you tie your shoes underwater? In a submarine

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What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

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Why did German shower heads have eleven holes? Because jews only have ten fingers.

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Why did the rooster chase the chicken? - They were playing tag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Whats the difference between andreas and a dog? the dog has a tail.

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The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

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my aunt Always used to say"go with the flow" she died in a kayak accident last Sunday

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live babies

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Why did the priest renew his...SHIT, A BEAR!!

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Why did the Sara fall off the swing, Because she had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there not sara.

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Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Gloves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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