What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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Wife: My husband is dead! Son: Sounds like a personal problem.

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Like Harry Potter? Like anti-jokes? Check these out: http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38139-why-did-dumbledore-fall-off-the-astronomy-tower-because-snape-killed-him http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38140-knock-knock-who-s-there-you-know-you-know-who-call-him-voldemort-fear-of-a-name-increases-fear-of-the http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38141-a-black-kid-an-asian-kid-and-a-jewish-kid-walk-into-a-barrier-they-are-students-at-hogwarts-school

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Why did the depressed man complain about life? He didn't he committed suicide.):

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Why was the salsa spicy? It has a mixture of many spicy peppers.

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jam ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

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Why does your mom moan and scream at night? She had a rough childhood, filled with all types of despair and disappointment.

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Why did the black guy jump into the pool? Because he wanted to go swimming

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Laura Pratz..

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YO momma is so fat she suffers from cardiovascular illnesses.

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black people. that is all...

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You know that you are going to fail horribly when... your purpose generally defeats the mission.

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Whats the difference between andreas and a dog? the dog has a tail.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

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Why do mermaids where seashells on their breasts? They don't wear anything because mermaids don't exist.

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What do you call a man with a convex isogonal nonprismatic head? Rhombicosidodecahedron head.

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i feel bad for black people (even though u can't consider them people)

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What’s the difference between Cool and Kool, the way you spell it

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Let's write an anti-joke. K.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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Why did the woman die Because she was old

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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