How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

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An asian kid in a classroom starts to squint to try to see the board that is far away. A white man looks at the kid and asks, "Hey asian, is it hard for you to see that board?" The Asian replies, "Yes, yes it is."

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Why did the girl fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms.

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An iguana walks out of a bar

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

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I know animal testing is cruel, but my dog did really well on the SATs.

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Q: What do you call a group of asians riding their bikes while carrying large bags of merchandise filled with an ample amount of video games? A: Obviously, a few enviromentally-friendly entrepreneurs who managed to make enough of a profit via their established buisness to the extent that they could buy what they required and get some other desired items as well.

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what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

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Q: Why did the girl fall of her swing? A: She was hit by a rogue fridge. Q: Why didn't she get back up? A: She was quite badly injured.

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Q. Why did the girl fall of the bridge A. Her dad pushed her

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your doorstep? A: Whatever his name is.

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Why does your mom moan and scream at night? She had a rough childhood, filled with all types of despair and disappointment.

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what did the 0 say to the 8 nice belt

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Ya well your momma's so hot...I'd bang her

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Do you think retarded people know that they are retarded? I don't know, you tell me. Wait a second....did you just call me retarded? They are clueless.

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Turtles

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A man was walking down the street and witnessed a car crashed. He was traumatize.

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What's brown and sticky? ...poop....and refried beans

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What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

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whats worst than reading youtube comments? Panic at the disco

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? Mentally confused.

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" I can't here you it's too dark!"

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? About 3:26 PM Eastern Standard Time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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