How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

what's an advantage of breaking every bone in your body? nothing, you're screwed.

Three men walk into a bar they suffer permanent brain damage, and completely lose their basic cognitive abilities. They will never be able to speak to one another again.

A man goes into a bar. He leaves drunk and beats his wife to death and burns the house and kids.

What's sad about Justin bieber getting thrown off of a cliff Nothing

Small Penis.

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? I don't know, he couldn't open it.

why did the hater hate? everyone else has a much better life

why did the other chicken cross the road peer pressure

2 guys at a funeral. "did you know the girl?" asks one of the guys. "No" replies the other. "Me neither."

Roses are red Violets are blue I look down My pants are brown.

What did the homeless man say to the man who gave him change? “Mmmm I sure do love pocket lint”

Three men walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

Knock Knock. Who's there? ...(No answer)

What did Osama bin Laden say when he heard loud gunshots outside his millitary compound? A: We'll never find out

Roses are reds, Viloets are blue, Thank God I'm a christian, And not a jew.

An old man walks into a bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

A woman went for a midnight jog. She's been missing for 12 years now.

What did the truck driver get when he ran over my cat? A pave low.

Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

What are you getting for Christmas? Wasted.

What did the first ant say to the second ant? Nothing. Ants are incapable of communicating via speech.

why did the Asian father want his son to be a doctor? because he wants his son to live good life so he could have a loving family and a payable job.

What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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