Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

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What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because there was a gunman on the same side of the path and it would most likely be safer to avoid making eye contact

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What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

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What do you call a person with 4 arms? A normal person. (fore arms) (meant to be audible)

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Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because they wouldn't be able to live anywhere else.

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Where did jimmy go when the bomb exploded.... (Everywhere )

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Why are the asians on cabin services? Because they do not speak english well enough to converse with guests.

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What do you get when you write your own anti-joke? Herpes.

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Crime in a hen house. All hens killed. Police found the suspected fox quickly and asked him if he have done it. No - he said. But it was him.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are powerful machines, capable of dismemberment and death when wielded by someone who wishes to cause harm

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Whats funny about a fat person dying? He died while eating friend chicken

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They say that men are from Mars, and women are from Venus. If that is true, then who on Earth are we? [L]

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why was 6 afraid of 7? Because ever since 3 died, 7 had changed. He had turned aggressive and randomly snapped and hit out at some of the other numbers for no apparent reason.

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Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

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wsde

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Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: We are both lawyers.

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What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

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A amazing I idiots D discover S sex

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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