a guy walked into a bar, ordered a drink, sipped it slowly thinking of his waisted youth. then he finished his drink and went home to his wife of 34 years

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How did the black man fall of the cliff? He was gazing over and realized he had Prostate cancer and fell off the cliif.

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

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What's both fun and a scam? -The holocaust

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whats black with purple?nothing no animals or humans have anything like that

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Who ever invented the "Knock- Knock jokes" should get a "No-bell prize"

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What goes up a hill with 4 legs and comes down with 3? A horse, which, upon reaching the top of the hill, has one of its legs chopped off, which is when the horse proceeds down the hill.

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Why was timmy live on the streets? His parents didnt have the money to abort him!! HaHa

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What's the easiest way to make new friends? With Play-Doh.

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There is a man laying on the floor in a pool of blood and vomit, there is a broken beer bottle in a puddle of beer next to him. He thinks is a sponge.Purple

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Why was the cancer patient often bullied by his peers? Because he happened to be an extremely bad person. He often annoyed people, was intransigent and often aggravated those around him causing them to bully him.

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What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

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how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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What do you say to a cat with a helmet on? Silly cat, you rhyme with hat but you shouldn't wear one.

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You:Knock knock friend:who's there you:come in friend come on who you:come in your mother

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How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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What do you do to Jewish people? You Challah at them.

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what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

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Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why didn't the chicken cross the road?!

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Q:What did the turtle say to the jaguar? A: Well, a turtle and a jaguar live in totally different habitats, turtles live in water while jaguars live in grasslands, so it would be unlikely for them to cross paths and communicate. Turtles and jaguars are unable to speak and, if a jaguar were to talk to a turtle, the turtle would be unable to make out words because turtles can only pick up vibrations. And, they would have nothing to talk about.

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How come Tommy isn't allowed to sing anymore? Because he has a punctured artery, collapsed lung, fractured ribcage, and a failed organ...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops