Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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I LOVE MASTURBAITING ALL DAY!!!!

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

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White NBA players.

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how do you get a clown off a swing. hit it with an apple in his nuts

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Whats 1 foot long and went in and out of my girlfriend? Our new baby

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What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

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Why wasent Toby at school He was hit by a tree

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But his one doesn't.

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What sport was the man with one leg excelling in? Ass kicking.

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What body part did German prince Heinrich von Missingpenis lack? His toenail.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Dave. Dave, who? Dave, your neighbor, I ran out of eggs making a quiche, could I borrow a few?

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A mass murderer ran into a bar full of people. He first shot a man. What did the man say when the murderer shot him? Nothing, he was hit in the head and instantly died before he could say anything.

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I C U P White stuff

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

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There was a asian jew and a black man standing at a bus stop wht do you call the Freinds

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Yo mama so dumb that she got mediocre grades throughout highschool and college which explains her less than desirable financial situation

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How do you piss off a jew slash his tires

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What's stupid a light bulb.

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What did one dog say the the other dog? "We are both dogs"

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Knock, Knock! Who`s there? Your mama`s stupid! Your mama`s stupid who? Your mama`s stupid as a rock! I` m going to cut your eyes out and use them as baseballs!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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