why was the kid sitting in a wooden chair? Because at the early age of four he was diagnosed with cancer and genital warts!

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knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

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Josh Groban, John Mayer, Ben Folds and Nick Cave are at an underground club that specialises in lithuanian folk music and siberian vodka. end of story

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Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

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Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

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Why did the fish look like a human? Because it was a person, drowning.

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How do you stop a rhino from charging? An ak-47

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Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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What color is the grass on Bob's lawn? Bob lives in a apartment.

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What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Two holocausts.

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If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop asking me if those jeans make you look fat?

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whats better than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees whats better than 1 baby nailed to 10 trees? 10 trees nailed to 1 baby

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead.

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What happens when you mix breed a cat and a human?? .. you get arrested and get raped by your fellow prisoners DONT do it!

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A good antijoke? Going to the last few pages of the "Popular" antijoke section....

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Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

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Why did the boy loose his glass with milk? He got hit by a bus.

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I was watching this one episode of mighty morphin' power rangers ......and i realized i got trapped in the 90's.... THANK YOU BOOTLEG TIME MACHINE FROM .....EBAY......it's always ebay.....

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what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

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A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

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A man driving through a thunderstorm said, "look, it's rain, dear." His wife, being a reindeer, took offense to that statement.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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