Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What are the first three words in a Mexican Cook Book? Steal a chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What worse than seeing a worm in your apple? Half a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: Whats horny and likes your leg? A: My dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A guy at a baseball game....

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the robot say to the boy? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and started to strangle the boy. The authorities tried to get the robot to stop but robots are too strong. When the robot had killed the boy, it self destructed.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A Jew walks into a shower. Gased.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats Funnier than a clown? Woman's Basketball.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what did the little boy say to his mom? nothing his mother died in childbirth.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats funnier then a children's hospital..... it catching on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

You mama's so fat, that the doctor suggested that she go on a diet.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: You tell her an anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems have endings

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What do you call an orange if it isn't orange? A: Nothing. Chances are you won't see it until it has ripened.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: How did the black man get the white man's money? A: He walked up, politely asked if he could borrow some money, and told him he would pay him back tomorrow.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

When life gives you lemons, you must also have a proportionally sufficient amount of both water and sugar in order to make lemonade.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock-Knock Who's there? A giant spider-like insect that lays eggs in your brain which turn into larvae that drop down onto your tongue and eat your teeth slowly, then form a cocoon and turn into the spider-like insect spoken of previously. You then wake up from this terrible nightmare and get ready for your well paying job.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed because of the fact that he had lost World War II.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The Dalai Lama orders a slice of pizza for $2 and gives the cashier a $5 bill. He then realizes he hasn't been given any change, so he asks for his change. The cashier quickly apologizes and hands the Dalai Lama three dollar bills.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you think it octopus.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops