What's the worst part about having sex with a two year old? -Hearing the hip bone snap. What's the best part about having sex with a two year old? -Hearing the hip bone snap.

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Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

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balls in ya mouf

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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A man walked into a bar. He said "ow".

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I was having sex with my girlfriend the other night and she called me a pedofile. i told her that was a pretty big word for a 9 year old.

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Have you heard the one about the drunk cleaning lady? I haven't either but I bet it is good. That is a pretty good premise for a joke.

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Baaaaaaahhhhhh

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ASSCHEEKS

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whats the same about a turtle and another turtle? they both seem to like lettuce

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what do you call a pizza with a lot of jalapenos. spicy.

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What did the baby said to her mother? Nothing because she aborted him

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Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

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What do you call a Mexican mixed with a platypus? a pineapple

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Knock knock! "It's unlocked"

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Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

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What side of the cheetah has the most spots? -The outside.

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Q: Whats worse then being murdered? A: Nothing

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What do you call Morgan Freeman on a bad day? Samuel L. Jackson.

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A black guy and a Mexican were in a car. Who was Driving? The police

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Why is the sky red in London? Fire.

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What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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