I you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

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Lilys are from england violets from japan. I've got a knife now get in the van

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How can you tell if someone is gay? It depends, sometimes they can be flamboyant or not. Actually, one could be straight and still be flamboyant, that's what makes the world less boring. Everyone is different, there's no surefire way of knowing, unless of course they tell you that they're gay.

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Q: What Jews are doing in Palestine? A: Living.

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What happened when a fish rode a bike? It fell off and injured itself.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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what do you call a black doctor ? a doctor moron

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WHat is the one thing an alcoholic needs everyday? Rehab.

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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your matriarchal component is so overweight that her body mass index is over the desired level for her height and age

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A pornstar walks into a church, she has remained close to Christ despite her condescending career choice.

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62

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What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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Q: What's more gross than uncooked hamburgers? A: Afterbirth.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was obviously trying to get to his work, however he realized he was jaywalking in front of a cop and had to pay a fine and ended up being late to work.

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Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?  No Neither has he

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I like boys!!!!! CC

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How did Peter Parker tell his uncle that he was Spiderman? He didn't because he was already dead.

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

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You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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Me: Tell me I'm a fairy. You: You're a fairy. Me: Poof! You're a bag of shit!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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