- Knock Knock - Whos there? - No one

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What did Jesus get for Christmas? Birthday presents.

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>>-------------[Knee]---------->>>

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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your fat

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What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 20 trees.

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A man walks into a bar. The bar tender asks him "why the long face?" He replies "Because I'm a horse, you jackass".

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In the future... "Hey Apple! Hey, hey Apple!" "What the heck, Orange! You've been doing this for the last 10 billion years!"

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Why did the young man have a young woman do cart wheels when he was in his tree house watching her do them on the ground? Who knows?He never shared his feelings.

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A zombie walks into a bar. It was shot by an M16 automatic rifle. The video game had zombies.

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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Q.Who do you call a lesbian. A.Shhaammmmm

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Why did the blind kid hit the other kid in the face? He was trying to give him a high-five.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Weird, orange is my favorite color.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The landlord. You're being evicted.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? Well that would be crude and insensitive to ask a person with dementia to do a task so easily performed by a person who is not non compos mentis.

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What's worse than finding jokes that repeat on Anti-Joke.com? AIDS

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What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

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A woman goes into the supermarket and buys a single banana, a canned meal for one and some ice cream. While paying for her items, the cashier looks up at her and says "I can tell you're single" "Oh yeah? How'd you know?" The woman asks. "Because you're ugly as fuck." Replies the cashier.

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What's my favorite color?? I don't have one, i'm a joke you idiot.

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Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

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What's blue and screams when you look at it Idk that's why I'm asking you

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What's the difference between a bucket of shit and a black guy? -the bucket.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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