Whats gay and smells like paint? A gay man covered in paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What's the difference between shoes and babies? You can't eat shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A dyslexic blind man walks into the bartender behind the bra

thumb_up thumb_down +36

what is big and can make things come out? a gun

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down +36

american idol

thumb_up thumb_down +36

when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Hey I just banged you, and it was crazy, delete my number, and keep the baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Once upon a time there was a tree. But it was just a tree, so it sat there. Then it didn't rain for a while, so the tree died. And nothing ever grew there again. The End

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A car crash.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call a black man that works with out pay? A volunteer

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's worse than AIDS Nothing can possibly be worse than finding out you have AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops