My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Once a upon a midnight haven. Along came a cow name Mr. Maven. For they say the cow was very lucky. But oh what a day for something very mucky. Oh ye the coming of Mr. Maven and his milk. And for every cereal there will be silk. But wait isn't Mr. Maven a guy? How can you milk him even if you try? I don't know, just sounds cool.

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An man was tested positive for HIV. He then called his girlfriend and told her she should get tested.

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Q: why couldn't anyone hear hellen keller when she fell off a cliff? A: she was mute.

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Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

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A guy reads the bible Another guy shouts "spoiler alert, the main character dies"

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Why did they use the phone as a football? Because it was a phone-ball.

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How can you tell if someone is a virgin? Everyone is a virgin in something. For example, if you never had sex with a dinosaur, then you are a virgin at dinosaur sex.

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What is worse than Jerry Sanduski? Nothing

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Granny P-O-R-N!!!!

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A:Who am i "RRRRRR' B:A pirate A:No im fetty wap

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what has wheels and runs on gas? a car with feet

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25

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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A horse walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything or say anything because it is a horse. It proceeds to walk around and knock over a few tables before finding the door.

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so a man walks into a bar, then the prison warden told him to calm doun.

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A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

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Ask me if I'm a human. Are you a human? Yes.

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Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Who me? Couldn't be.

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What's worse than a burglar breaking into your house in the middle of the night? A rapist breaking into your house in the middle of the night.

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Q. What is the difference between an ass kisser and a brown noser? A. Depth Perception.

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What is worse than being eaten alive by a shark? Being force fed live goat intestines while Kevin Spacey rapes your father.

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Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

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There's two blondes a black man and a camera man...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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