How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

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why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

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Roses are bitches Violets are two, your mother is a bigger bitch then both

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Mila Kunis is fugly. Said no one ever.

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

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Why did timmy's face turn red? Early that morning Timmy was brutally attacked by the local street gang which proceeded to smack timmy's face with a baseball bat and smearing the blood with a dirty rag.

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A Matthew walks into a room. Everyone left. This is not a joke

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How do you tick off a Doctor? You cut off his right thumb.

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A Christian and an Atheist are in a bar, the Christian turns to the Atheist and says "If you don't believe in god you will go to hell." The Atheist replies "Your Mom doesn't believe in god." And then turns around to order another drink.

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Why didn't the boy eat his soup? It was to hot.

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A man walked into a bar. He was only 19, but technically a man. Underage drinking is not O.K.

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So FDR walks into a bar.

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Why is moral man a great Cerebrity? you would not get it, its too cerebral... Moral: I SAID LEAVE HIM ALONE PLEAAAAAAAAAASE! BUAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

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Rsoes are geern Voielts are ornage I'm colorbilnd and Dixlesic.

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Whats more funny than 1 bomb on 8 babies? 8 bombs on 1 baby.

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What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

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What do you get when you mix a Refrigerator with a dog? Nothing. That would be impossible.

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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She Explored My Body, Licked, Sucked, Swallowed! When Satisfied, She Left! . . . . Damn Mosquito!!!

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Q. What do you call a black pilot? A. A pilot.

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What is the hardest thing about eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

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There are 2 muffins in an oven One of the muffins says to the other 'Jeez it's hot in here' Then the other muffin replied, 'OH MY GOD IT'S A FRICKEN TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!!!!

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What's worse than hitting your funny bone on a chair............... Hearing one person say "its friday" then realizing that you are now singing

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops