Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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How many new born babies does it take to cover the wall? Depends on how hard you throw'em

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What was Helen Keller's favourite colour? None, due her disability she was unable to see colours...

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Why did the chicken cross the road...

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What did the librarian say to the rude man who was talking very loudly? The librarian said "shhh keep it down."

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People shouldnt make fun of holocaust jokes..my grandpa died cause of it! he fell off the gaurd tower

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Why couldn't John play soccer? Because he was arrested for being black.

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whats worse then a truck full of babies? if it went off a cliff into a canyon full of knives.

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A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

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Roses are car Violets are giraffe this poem makes no sense microwave

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a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a double whiskey. The bar man says "what's with the long face"? The horse replies "My wife left me, took the kids with her, took everything, I'm devastated"

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Q) What did one chicken say to the other? A) Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

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Two fish we're in a tank.. Yup.

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Your're racist.

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A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

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When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

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What is white and re(a)d all over? White paper that is dyed red.

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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What do u call 2 black people in the front of a car 3 in the back and 2 on top of the car going off a clif? A waste u can fit 2 more in the trunk

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What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

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A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops