Q. bob had 93 chocolate bars and ate 74 what does he have now? A. diabetes

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A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

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27

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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I am paralyzed from the neck down.

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Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin, "Sure is hot in here." The other muffin says, "AHHHH! A talking muffin."

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An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Nothing, the mouse was incapable of speech due to the elephants actions.

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What do you do when you find a blonde on her knees? Help her up, because obviously she has fallen.

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I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

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why did the man ride the helicopter,because he was hurt horrible in a car accident.

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Yo momma so fat she decided to have lipo suction

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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I have alzheimers and one day me and my nephew were............................

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A man walks into a bar. He is knocked unconscious, and passers-by rush to his aid.

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yo mammas so fat when she runs the world spins faster

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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What did Susie do when the music was too loud Nothing

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

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What did the woman say to the black man in bed Good morning honey

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Q: Why is Little Johnny in the hospital with a bullet wound and a broken arm? A: I shot him of his bike.

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Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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