How do you wake Lady GaGa up? set her alarm for a reasonable hour.

Why did Hitler go to the hospital? Because he shot and poisoned himself.

What has two arms, and two legs but cant walk? A Cripple

How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

Me: so Megan did it hurt Megan fox: did what hurt? Me: when ur aged face wasn't good enough for the new transformers movie?

what is the square root of pi? crust^2 + Cool Whip

What makes the world go round? Gravity.

What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

Why did the baby cross the street? It was stapled to the chicken

How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was wearing a shirt depicting a skull, something six had an irrational phobia of.

What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

Your mama's so fat, that at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to diet and exercise before her obesity manifested itself in a variety of chronic afflictions that would detract from her ability to lead a long life.

Why did the black guy not have friends He was socialy awkward

Two men are talking at a bar. They both order the same drink but are charged different prices. Angered, one of them men confronts the bartender. A fight breaks out and the bartender is seriously injured.

what do an elephant, a fishook, and a spaceship have in common? absolutely nothing

What do you call a man with 3 legs and one arm jumping on a trampoline? By his name.

Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

how do you make a janeter cry, you shit on the floor

What did the college kids drink at the party? Soda. Alcohol is illegal for people under the age of 21 to consume.

How do you make a clown stop smiling? You kill his family.

I made a friend today. His name is don. He poops burritos. I like burritos.

Wher did suzy go after the explosion? everywhere

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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