Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape his burning car wreck.

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Why was the teacher having sex with her pupils? Because it was 2145 and that kind of shit is common then

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Life is like a box of chocolates. The worst ones remind you of how horrible your life is.

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What did the fork say to the spoon? To get to the other side.

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Rsoes are geern Voielts are ornage I'm colorbilnd and Dixlesic.

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What has nine arms and sucks? Four children with two arms snacking on a lollipop, and one child with one arm snacking on a lollipop.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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What's the difference between video games and a naked chick? The Holocaust.

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop 397, IF you have a big tounge

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KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Why am I telling you this joke? Because I entered the following, agreed to the Terms of Service, and clicked "submit".

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A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

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How many like does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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whats hard long and you put it in your mouth everyday a toothbrush

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Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

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What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

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What is your name, sir? My name is not Sir, my name is Jeff.

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? It isn't numbers are not sentiment objects therefore incapable of feeling fear

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A blonde walks into a bar. She got free drinks.

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Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops