A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks "What can I get for you?" The man replies, "a drink"

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Heroshima

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

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How did Jesus walk on water? Jesus is God in the form of a man, and he is the only human being ever with the ability to perform miracles

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A storm be brewin!

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Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

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What has Whitney Houston got in common with a spider? They're both black and they can't get out of the bathtub

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your mom is so black that it can be assumed she is of african descent

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Knock knock Who’s there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

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Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

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A jew was walking down the street what did he see? the holocaust

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What do you call Madeline McCann at the bottom of the sea? Drowned Madeline McCann.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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Are you from Africa because you sure look likes you've got Ebola

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look im not better than you, your a ten im a two your a queen im a fool you got looks i got scares u got talent i got beuty to its a win win

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To suck my dick

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Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

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There are 10 fish, 5 of them drown, how many are left? 10, fish can't drown

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What is brown and green and goes 100 mph? A tree falling down on your house.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown.

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Why was the cookie sad? It had just been eaten and is currently disintegrating in the hydrochloric acid of someones stomach.

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roses are red violets are blue daffodils are yellow pansies are pink

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What do you call a black man flying a plane ? - a pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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