What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

Knock, Knock Who's there? The Johnson Family was then heard on the morning news for letting a murderer into their home before being brutally killed.

Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

What does water taste like? Water

Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

My dog has no nose, how does it smell? Using its anus.

Q: How many elephants can fit inside a Volkswagen Beetle? A: Four.

Yo mama got so bad teeth her dentist said she should get them surgicly removed and get lifelike dentures

Boob

What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

guess what I'm going to Spain on my holidays

knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

What's worse then getting a broken bone? A large marsupial charging at you with vicious speed

A man was shot. He died.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? A teenage girl was texting and driving, didn't see it, and now it's roadkill.

I like to give help to people, expecting that they will be my slaves for life.

What did little Ben's mom give him for Christmas? Nothing. She died last month

how many mexicas does it take to.... on wait there done

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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