A Scotsman, an Irishman and an Englishman walk into a bar... They enjoy their drinks and leave.

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How many cans does the average alcoholic drink in one night? None. Cans are solid and therefore cannot be drank.

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What is rectangular, white and has two wheels? A limo getting its wheels replaced.

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What grows on trees and is woody? Wood.

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What do a lamp and a elephant have in common? Big ears, except for the lamp, it doesn't have ears.

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Why Didn't The Teenager Bring His Report Card Home to His Parents? Because He Was Murdered By Thugs Walking Home From School.

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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Why is my grandpa always so grumpy? Because he has diabetes and life is very difficult for him.

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you're so stupid, you have trouble understanding what you read, like the newspaper, for example

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Jesus Christ

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What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

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why did the cow say baaaaa ? it was a stupid cow

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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Yo mama's chest is so flat that it's because she has stage five breast cancer and had to get both her breasts removed.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

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How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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why did the man cross the rode? He didn't he got hit by a bus

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What color is a red house Red What color is a blue house Blue What color is a white house White What color is a green house Clear

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Whats The diference between a park bench and a black man? A park bench can support a family of five hahahhaahahah

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

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Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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What do you call a joke that isn't funny? A joke that isn't funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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