Roses are red violets are blue I fucked your mom now im about to fuck you to.

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Why did the shrimp refuse to share? Because he was a little shellfish.

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What is the difference between a goat? It can neither ride a bike.

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Why did the man have a finger coming out of his ear? He had a birth defect.

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

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why does andy speak when not spoken too because he wants a smack

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Why didn't the man go to work on Friday the 13th? Because he was unemployed.

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Why did Lucy drop her ice-cream ? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who is there ? NOT LUCY !

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Your mother is so fat that LOWERLOWEOROLWERLOWEH OIRH OWER IOWEJ OR OIJWE :JWEJKLR

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So theres a Black guy, White guy and Mexican guy all sitting at a bar. They were friends.

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Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

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An anti joke a day... really doesn't actually do that much

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A guy walks up to a midget and he says: 'What do you want to be when you grow up?'

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What's round and bounces A basketball No!!!!!!! You dummy!!! Then what? Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A:Whats the air speed velocity of a swallow? B:What an african or English swallow? A:Well I don't know that.

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Why should you never attempt to rob Chuck Norris? Because he will beat you up as he knows self defense.

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Q: What's the upside to your otherwise miserable life? A: You only got raped twice last week.

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What do you call a woman between two houses? Her name.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

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why did the old man lose his hair Because he had cancer and needed kimmo therapy

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The word "Walter" is never funny.

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A deaf man sits down puts on his headphones presses play on his ipod starts to nod his head and realises what he has just done

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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