joe galasso from plainview ny

How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

what happened when the shoe turned into a shoe.......... nothing, it was a raisin

What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

Why did Quinn yell at his group project partner? Because he hated him.

1.Why were the black men asked to leave the bar? Because it was a womens bar. 2.Why did the 40 year old get an erection? Because he was excited.

What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

Nero, I can barely stay awake, can we chat more later today though? I would really enjoy that, and sleep before that.

Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

My Nan, that is all.

How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cupboard cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Q: Whats about two feet in width and length with purple veins throbbing at the sides? A: A midget slowly dying of frostbite

What did the orphan say to his parents? nothing

Roses are red, violets are blue, they really should be purple.

How do you confuse a blonde? Beat her with a spatula while in a mankini with a dildo up your ass!

What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

What do a banana and helicopter have in common? Neither is a police officer

Your mama's so hairy, she has to shave occasionally.

On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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