What's worse than an arrow to the knee? -A bullet in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I want to get you pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down

9/11 my birthday

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Finding an apple inside your worm.

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats a black and white and red all over? i dont know...who spends their time researching this kind of stuff

thumb_up thumb_down

What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

thumb_up thumb_down

A priest, a nun and an Irishman walk into a bar. The barman says 'what is this, a joke?'

thumb_up thumb_down

Why do Asians get 50% off on movies? They don't.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why is the boy sad? He was getting bullied so he later on talked to a teacher and the bully and him settled their differences. The bullied boy still wishes the bully to go to hell.

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks off the top of a very tall building. Why did he fall off? Because he was blind

thumb_up thumb_down

a horse walks into a bar, hours later it walks out on two legs and the man who saw it all happen couldn't believe his eyes. The man then turns to the bartender and says, "I theenk eye've had enuf, Cut me hoff!"

thumb_up thumb_down

If quizzes are quizical, what are tests? Testicals

thumb_up thumb_down

So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

thumb_up thumb_down

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the grape say to the bannana? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down

I would tell you a joke about a blunt pencil but it's pointless

thumb_up thumb_down

I used to work as a human cannonball. I thought I was going to get fired, however during one performance the trajectory was miscalculated and I ended up severely damaging my spinal cord. I now work from home as a IT consultant. It's depressing.

thumb_up thumb_down

The other day I went to the holocaust museum and it was horrible No air conditioning or cold drinks

thumb_up thumb_down

My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down

why was 6 afraid of 7 7 was a serial rapist with a anger problem

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a convicted rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down

womans having rights.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops