i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

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What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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What did one volcano say to the other? Nothing. Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

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whats gay and american? a gay american

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Why didn't the kid return home after school? He was having a sleep-over with a bunch of his friends. Who all died from a robbery.

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You wanna pop a bottle? I hope you are referring to bottles of water as I am underage and I refuse to partake in any said consumption of alcoholic beverages

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your mammas so big that she needs paint rollers to put on lipstick

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whats a joke... Parker Coffey at life

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are you But the roses have wiltered The violets are dead The sugar bowl is empty And so is your head

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

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what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

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What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

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A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane where having a bet on who could swim the furthest without getting wet on their hair. The Swede could have done better... The Dane did surprisingly well. The Norwegian, being bald, was disqualified. Moral: I still have some hair left!

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A black man,a Hispanic man, and a white man are in a race. The white man wins because he took steroids and used somebody else's urine for the drug test.

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What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

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if you can read this you dont' need glasses

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What do you call a man with an arrow to the knee? An ambulance because he's got a serious leg injury right there.

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A lion, a tiger, and a bear walk down the side of the road. This is what I observed last week in a suburb of Columbus, Ohio.

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why did the 60 year old touch the little boy's penis? because he was a pedophile.

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Excuse me, I have a shitload of stuff to do, so you are Eliza huh? I thought that was just one person conveying something to someone. Anyway, what is your name? My name is actually Nero, but you do not strike me as an Eliza, first name is more than enough. You know, if you dare, Ill be back shortly, I was gonna shower but then again, I haven't moved at all today, so yeah. Saved you? I have never saved anyone well, excuse me then, see you around, worry less about people bothering with us chatting, hell they might risk learning something (not a chance, people here are fucking jackasses, with one exception, and I do not mean me this time).

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1 111111 1 1 11111111111 1 1 111111 1

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What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

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A apple is red a banana is to never mind that joke sucks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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