Why did Suzie fall off the swings? Because she didn't have arms or legs. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bicycle.

A man walks into a bar…. he then looks around checking to make sure no one saw this abashing action. He sees no one did then plashing a big smile on hst face he begins to strut forward only to trip over an empty can of spray cheese. it is important to note that this spray cheese was low fat

What do you call a Mexican hockey player? A hockey player.

how much did the asian man pay for his operation? nothing. he's dead.

What did the ant say to the bush? Ernest Borgnine.

Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made the man who said shut up mad so he told the man to shut up.

What did the rabbi say to the Muslim? I don't know I wasnt there. But it probably had something to do with their varying religions.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To go to work. And be sexually harassed. For 70 cents on the dollar.

What do you call a black man who lands on the moon? An astronaut...f*cking racist.

What's windy and sunny at the same time? The weather.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -George. -George Who? -George Carpenter, Remember? We were in the same class in third grade. -Come on in!

so a man walks into a bar, then the prison warden told him to calm doun.

Here isa poem from a dog Roses are gray violets are a different shade of gray Let's go chase cars

Guys, I think I'm gonna apply to join the Crips. My SAT score is a 2050, and their average score is a 2200. My GPA, however, is a 4.6, and their average is only a 4.2. Do you guys think that they will take me? Or should I try and apply for the Bloods?

I was relaxing on the beach today when a fat bird came over and said, "Would you rub this lotion into my back please?" "I'm afraid I'm only here for the day," I replied.

What happened to the mentaly challenged person is walking down the street? He pooped on the sidewalk and got escorted to his house

What's the difference between a goat and a cherry? You can't put a goat on top of your ice cream.

Guy 1: Where's your dog Guy 2: I Dunno Guy 1: I ate it

There once was a girl who took away my source of entertainment. Her name was Nicole.

What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

dark humor is like food... not everyone gets it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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