Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

Why is Wednesday a bad day? Because at some point, Monday will come around again.

how do you know when you're a man? massive erection.

whats worse than ur granny dying? uhhh...actually theres nothing is worse

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Orchids are white, Sunflowers are yellow

what's worse than 10 dead babies in one trash can? 1 baby in ten trash cans

Knock Knock Who's there? Immigration. You're headed back to mexico.

Q: you wanna hear a joke? A: yeah sure. Q: well im not gnna.

-What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? -Slap HER!

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Yes.

Who is the fattest mexican on the earth? Not Osama because he's dead...and he wasn't mexican..

A hooker walks into a hospital. Only to find out that she has aids.

I want to tie a baby to the back of a truck then reverse into a wall.

What happened when the Arabic man went through airport security? He was racially profiled and stopped, delaying not only him but the line of people behind him.

A Russian man walks out of a bar looking very sober because he walked out of the bar sober.

What did man who had diarrhea say to the other man? "I have to go to the toilet."

Peas

Why did the guy get glasses? So he could get his dick into the vagina.

What would happen if you insulted Chuck Norris' mother? Considering you did it on a messageboard that only unemployed people with no social lives use, nothing.

A: How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q: None! They shouldn't have to...

How high is the grass in Germany? Approximately the same height as the grass in America.

A man walks into the kitchen tells the woman to make him a sandwich and walks out.

Why didn't Santa deliver presents until the night after Christmas? You should go ask someone who knows.

Why didnt jerry trip over a slug? Because jerry is an arabian and the atmosphere in arabi is to hot for a slug.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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