What do you call a man who's arms have been amputated? It doesn't matter, he won't be able to pick up the phone.

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Why couldn't the horse open the door? - Because it was locked...Beeeeeeeeeeeeeef Jelly

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Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

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One Zebra and One Elephant was walking in the desert, the Zebra said its hot and the elephant said i know.

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What is the biggest lie ever? "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Use"

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie!

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"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."

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Why didn't the little girl show up for school? Because she was dead.

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Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

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A Jew, a Russian, and a Turk walk into a bar. The Jew asks, "Can I get a glass of Manischewitz?" The bartender serves him. The Russian asks, "Can I get a shot of vodka?" The bartender serves him. The Turk then asks, "Can I get a Turkish coffee?" The bartender looks at him, confused, and says, "Sorry, but this is a bar. Unfortunately we don't serve coffee."

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what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

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why did the girl slap joe? he had a boner.

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Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

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Q. What goes "ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP"? A. Nothing does.

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Your Mama is so old, that she is probrably going to die pretty soon.

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A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

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baby on board sign?? target aquired.............

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Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

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A man goes to the doctor and complains: "Doctor, my Viagra hasn't worn off! It's been over eight hours!" The doctor replies "You were bitten by a banana spider. You have one day to live.

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Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

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Two Irish men walk in to a bar. Or maybe it was three. It's actually quite a common occurrence here in Dublin.

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What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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