Science fact: what would happen if you lined up all the veins in your body? You would die.

What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? An Irishman with a metal bar (like a pole)

What do the angels say when god sneezes? Chuck bless you

Why did the man die when he hugged the pillow? He was hallucinating at the grand canyon.

phil - "honey, why is the picture quality so bad" Phil was watching a toaster

Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

whats worse than finding a joke in a cracker? finding an anti joke in a cracker.

Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

what did the left foot say to the right foot? Nothing, feet don't talk

What does a black guy get for Christmas? Everything you own

69

read me write me

A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

What's the easiest way to get a cat out of a tree? Call the fire department and allow them to safely reach the cat and properly extract it from the tree while you watch from below.

What's a Democrat's favorite activity? Blaming Republicans for shit they didn't do.

Why are bannanas bendy? Because unlike cucumbers bannas are not grown in a tube and are left to grow at their own pace.

Q: What do you call a stop sign in the winter? A: A stop sign in the winter.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Not your cheese.

Roses are red Violets are blue These two lines are overused I wonder to what poem they originally come from

What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

Q: How much jizz does a gay guy have? A: a butt load

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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