An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

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Why is Chuck Norris so frickin awesome? He just is cause he's chuck norris

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I´ll give anything to be screw by you.

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Whats faster than a mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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Roses are purple violets are green I am color blind shut up

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why did the woman walk into the kitchen? i don't know, but the better question is why she left in the first place.

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Chuck Norris was dropped twice when he was a baby, once on concrete and once on hardwood

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How do you know when your pizza is ready? When the oven timer goes off, indicating that it is done.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

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hi

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What did one ginger say to the other We have red hair

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? There was no cross walk.

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how do u stop a cat from peeing on the floor? Kill it... haha

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How do you drown a blonde. Put a scratch 'n' sniff at the bottom of a pool.

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why is kool-aid so sweet? Because it contains sugar

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Roses are red Violets are blue Thats what they tell me because I'm blind

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I've always hated people saying "last one there is a rotten egg" because don't you want to be a rotten egg so you don't get eaten?

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What did the panda say to the other panda? We are fuzzy Oreos

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Dolly Parton's bobbs are so fake that they both have silicone in them.

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Getting all F's on your report card isnt that bad.... I mean you could go home to find your whole family murdered and your Girlfriend hanging from a noose.

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"Why isn't Bud capable of reading?" Bud is a stone "Why can't Peter drive?" Peter is a woman

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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What did the black guy get for Christmas? (In 1938) A bruise from the Klu Klux Klan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops