What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A unicorn

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What do you call a Mexican who steals cars? John Doe, until he's been identified.

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Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? It isn't numbers are not sentiment objects therefore incapable of feeling fear

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A man said to a performer performin in a concert,"Go break a leg!". The performer did not respond because he is perfoming.

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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Why did the man have a really short temper? HOW THE **** SHOULD I KNOW???

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having a giant, angry ape on steroids rip your heart out and eat it before your eyes as you painfully die from the unbearable pain and rapid blood loss.

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Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

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why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

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why did the man take a poo because his rectum exploded

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink successfully, pays, and leaves. Three weeks later he dies tragically.

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why do midgets surf in kitchens? because of microwaves.

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Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, I do not stand for them.

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Whats the difference between males and females? fe

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What's hairy and sags? A ball sack

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roses are red violets are violet hey look up there! Its a suicide pilot!

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How many women does it take to changed a light bulb? 12. 11 to form a committee and 1 to make her boyfriend do it.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 was a pussy.

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If I could rearrange the letters of the alphabet.... dklaujeo bnvalue doiandkluq!!

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"Hey, do you guys wanna hear a joke?!" -no, shut up.

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How much weight can an ant carry up a mole hill? Ice cream has no bones.

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Why didnt sally throw out her lunch? Her mom had a miscarriage, she was never born.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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