Why was the house on fire? A dog peed on it.

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Golf.

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a man walks into a bar with a poodle stuffed halfway up his rectum... WHY ARE YOU WAITING FOR A PUNCHLINE!? MY GOD! THIS MAN HAS A DOG UP HIS ANUS!

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Why can Michael Jackson no longer moonwalk? because he's dead.

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Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

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So, I walked into my friends house and MAH DEDDEHS DECK was outside bruh

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Q: what is the best way to pick up jewish chicks. A: with a pickup line and possibly a gift such as chocolates or flowers

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In class a teacher said "Stand up if you think you'r stupid" A kid stands and the teacher ask why? The kid said: "Oh I thought it'd be a bit fair since your standing up.

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

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What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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When did Rick Santorum realize he was gay? When we woke up with a bloody condom in his ass.

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what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

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What do you get when you have 5 Russians, a few 8 year olds, and guns? A kidnapping

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knock knock... whos there? NOT BIN LADEN!

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I was expecting something like that... Anyway, good you do not mind in particular, because that means I am just boring myself here, so, tell me something about yourself you don't tell people most.

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-Your momma is so ugly, she wasnt a model. -Am I supposed to be caring?

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what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

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What did the muslim say when he boarded the plane? Where is my seat

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Why did the chicken cross the road. Because the grocery store only sold pork

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What's purple, smells like an eggplant, and looks like an eggplant? An eggplant.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his kids.

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops