Y' can't spell rape without ape.

Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

Why did the girl run to school Because a lion was chasing her

Q:If quizes are, "guizicles," then what are tests? A:Who calls quizes, "quizicles?"

What did the empty bar stool say to the one next to him? "You look like you have a lot on your shoulders!"

what the difference between a dog and a blue whale? im going to burn your house down

If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

What is White on Top and Black on bottom? Micheal Jackson.

"hey do you know the date" "58"

Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

red is red blue is blue derpy derp de derp

A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

A lot eh?

Diarrhea

But officer, I did come to a full stop!

A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

Rebecca Black walked into a stadium. There were so many seats to choose from. But, she sat down in the nearest seat she could find and enjoyed the football game.

why did the pancake eat a spanish holiday? Because a plane crashed into his condominium

Who would win, Chuck Norris or a T-Rex? The T-Rex, Chuck Norris would get ripped apart like any other human-being.

Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to commit suicide

What did the white man say to the black man? Did you see the game yesterday?

What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

Whats the difference between obama and Michael Jackson? Michael Jackson Is dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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