Why did the elephant die? It was murdered by poachers for it's valuable ivory tusks.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Wife: "I suggest you check properly next time you lose your keys so that you find them quicker" Husband: "I suggest that next time I sit down and have a beer while I wait for Doc Martin and his time machine to give my keys back.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Die.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Yo momma so fat, when she sits on a rainbow nothing happens, as rainbows are merely rays of light refracted off of water particles in the air, apparent to humans only on a visible spectrum.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: Where do zombies shop? A: Zombercrombie.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the 15 year old commit suicide? Because his parents and 3 sisters died in a car accident and he went to live with his uncle, who constantly raped him.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Hail Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what happened to the man who fell off the boat? He died!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

how do you drowned a blonde? put ankle weights on her and throw her in a river.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

wat did one chicken say to the other bock bock

thumb_up thumb_down -5

An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his mother at the hospital who is dying of cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What does a black guy get for Christmas? Everything you own

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Sam slept and never woke up again.. Because he followed his dream.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did enzo give courtney for her 69th birthday? A cake that looked like a pussy cat named kyle

thumb_up thumb_down -5

2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q:What do you call a mexican witha clean record? A: Impossible

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the old lady call the black pilot who's name was Marcus? Marcus

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? eating the worm causing it to breed inside of your body later causing them to eat you internally

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stock market crashed 600 points today, and his retirement account took a hit. He can't afford his car anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a blonde who can't read? an infant

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops