Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

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how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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whats stupid, retarded, and dumb an Erin Perri.

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What did the policeman say to the man accused of murder? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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yo momma is so fat her doctor recommended a new healthy diet.

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Why did the White guy wanna be Black? He liked basketball.

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Why shouldn't women wear watches? Because there's a clock on their cell phones.

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What blue and red? poop in a saggy bag

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Why was the salsa spicy? It has a mixture of many spicy peppers.

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A priest, a Rabi, and a Monk walk out of the bar and go home.

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Why don't chickens where pants? Cause they're animals,duh.

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Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

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What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

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A straight-A star quarterback was about to throw the game-winning pass during the final game of his school's season. If he got this pass their undefeated record would have been completed for the last 50 years. Before he threw the pass, he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

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A straight man walks into a gay bar and is amazed by the amount of fun he has and how cool people can be when you don't judge someone based on sexual preference or your own religious beliefs.

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Whats the difference between andreas and a dog? the dog has a tail.

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What's the difference between a duck? A vest has no sleeves.

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Roses are red Violets are red Everything is red If you are dead... Or a potato

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what did the ninja say to the watermelon ? nothing

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What did the deer say to the hunter? If you shoot me i'll die.

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how many letters are in Montana? 7 yes

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knock knock go away

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guy 1- damn its hot in here guy 2- then turn on the damn fireplace

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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