Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a giraffe? A really f*cked up hybrid.

My mind is like full of holes so I cannot remember where I am anymore, and I am tired in addition, but say, what the hell is a tussle? Sounds cute, but what is that?

Knock Knock? Whos there? Not Madeleine McCann.

What do you call a griraffe and a duck who's favorite colors are both purple? A coincidence in which two unrelated species have the same preference in colorant hues.

AARgh my name is AWsaing the nawant of the where of amzai Giant rabbit bunny

why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Nobody, this is a metaphorical door..

What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

What used to be red, but isn't anymore? A scalped ginger.

Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

roses are red violets are blue wanna hear a joke? WNBA....

Until further notice Penn State's take your child to work day has been canceled.

whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Ebola, You're going to die.

A guy walks into a bar and falls.

What did the one Brick say to the other Brick? We have the same name.

Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

A king's son's birthday was coming up and the king asked,"Son i'm the king. You can have anything you want." And the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." For his birthday he got a rollar coster, a pizzaria, a new car, and of corse, some purple ping pong balls. The next year the king asked,"Son, i'm the king, you can have anything you want." and the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." And for his birthday he got a manchin, an iphone, a water park, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. One day, the prince was driving in his car and was in a terrible car accadent. On his death bed, his father asked him one final question,"Son, why did you want all of those purple ping pong balls?" And the son answered,"Well, i wanted all of them because-" and then he died.

Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

Yo mama so fat that when she jumped into a pool she displaced more water than someone who was of a normal weight

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...