A dyslexic man walked into a bar. Even though he couldn't read the sign, it was still a bar.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller read? She was blind

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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How many fingers am I holding up? None, my fingers were blown off by a hand grenade.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? the pizza wont scream when you put it in the oven.....

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Why did the woman die Because she was old

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroying his family.

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Have you heard the one about the drunk cleaning lady? I haven't either but I bet it is good. That is a pretty good premise for a joke.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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What's 6+2? 16

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A man sat down Then he stood up

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- Bob, what's interesting to see in NYC ? - Yes, exactly

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I love you.

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What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

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What was wrong with the tree? Nothing

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Why did the black kid fail in school? Because of the achievement gap.

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Guess what? SHADAP

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How do fish die in water? The BP oil spill

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Why does the Easter Bunny deliver chocolate eggs? Because

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A Catholic Priest, an Anglican Priest, and a Rabbi were in a train carriage together because they got a package deal to go to a conference on religious tolerance. Good for them.

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What did the young girl with leukemia say to a stranger? I am afraid

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A man comes home late from work what does he find? His wife and children murdered.

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Knock Knock Who's there A pile up A pile up who

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Knock Knock Business Man: Who's There? Al Qeada Business Man: Al Qeada who? Al Qeada is flying an airplane into your building Then a commercial airplane flew into the oddly placed door on the 95th floor of the North Tower. That's how 9/11 happened. Have a nice day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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