What is the difference between a monkey and a pig? A monkey doesn't snort drugs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

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Why did lady gaga set her alarm? So she could get up in the morning.

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"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

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Why did the plain crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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why did the man have solar panels on his house? because he had some money left over cos he won the lottery

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a retard? NOTHING!!!!!!

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what was the first thing Barack Obama said to the people of america? ... hi

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Q: What Jews are doing in Palestine? A: Living.

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What is the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry Potter escapes the chamber.

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One night a kid heard thunder and got scared. So he went to his parents bed and asked he could sleep with them. His mom said " Sure just don't look under the covers." He said okay and he looked under the covers and said " Daddy, why is your snake in Mommy's garden?"

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Q. why didnt the boy get a christmas present from his dear grandmother? A. because she died on thanksgiving

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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Why did the blond jump off the cliff? She was paragliding for her 20th birthday.

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Q: So why does an Asian guy look at these two black guys and a white woman in the middle? A: Because he wants an oreo cookie.

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Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

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69

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-Why did Sara fall off the swing? -I don't know, why? -She had no arms, knock knock -Who's there? -Not Sara.

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What did Bobby get for Christmas? Nothing, Bobby is an orphan and has no friends.

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What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

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Why did the black guy not have friends He was socialy awkward

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What's black and white and red all over? A Giant Panda that has been killed by poachers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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