What is the difference between a fridge? I'm sorry, I have a severe mental disability and telling jokes is not... F'tang F'tang Zoop Pong Wii!

cool story babe. now go make me a sammich.

Guy 1: (to guy 2) Close your eyes, stand on one leg, spin around, and yell "I have never eaten a cucumber!". Guy 2: No. Guy 1: Ok.

Why did the boy wear a winter jacket on the hottest day of the year? Because the boy was in antarctica and the hottest day was still below freezing.

why did the black guy cross the street? to get to the package store.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

What's Kanye West's goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

Why can't a blonde swim? Because in this economy her parents never took her to a pool in which she could get swimming lessons and practice to be able to be a good or maybe great swimmer.

Why did the robot cross the road? Because It was bionically fused to the chicken.

tennis grunts . . . no different from sex noises

What's the scariest thing about the dark? There's a black man in my bed.

Why did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

whats worse than 2 jews 3 jews

How do you get a tissue to dance. You don't.

when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

Why couldn't the dwarf mother reach for the top shelf? Her height was at a mini-mum.

What do you call a black drug dealer? A black man that works as a drug dealer

What did the magician say to the little boy after he "cut" his mother in half. She is dead now. Your dad is on Row 4, he is crying.

What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Eating mud

Why didn't Susie do her reading homework? She is blind and her school system cannot Afford to teach her to read braille

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? To get to the other side!

What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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