- Anti Joke

Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

Text this number just cuz 16305208722

Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

What's worse than blowing out 1 lightbulb Blowing out 2 lightbulbs

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

Looks like this is a puts on sunglasses Pair of sunglasses

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Your mothers so dumb that when she had to take a math test, she received a significantly lower grade than the rest of her classmates.

What's the difference between communism and race mixing? Zey come for our blood, but drown in zeir ovn!!!!!

What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

A horse walks into a bar, and the barman says "why the long face?" The horse replies, "I am Sarah Jessica Parker."

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

If there's something strange in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The Police.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

Text this number just cuz 16305208722

Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

What's worse than blowing out 1 lightbulb Blowing out 2 lightbulbs

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

Looks like this is a puts on sunglasses Pair of sunglasses

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Your mothers so dumb that when she had to take a math test, she received a significantly lower grade than the rest of her classmates.

What's the difference between communism and race mixing? Zey come for our blood, but drown in zeir ovn!!!!!

What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

A horse walks into a bar, and the barman says "why the long face?" The horse replies, "I am Sarah Jessica Parker."

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

What does 2 + 2 equal? 4

23

What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

If there's something strange in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The Police.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

Text this number just cuz 16305208722

Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

What's worse than blowing out 1 lightbulb Blowing out 2 lightbulbs

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

Looks like this is a *puts on sunglasses* Pair of sunglasses

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Your mothers so dumb that when she had to take a math test, she received a significantly lower grade than the rest of her classmates.

What's the difference between communism and race mixing? Zey come for our blood, but drown in zeir ovn!!!!!

What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

A horse walks into a bar, and the barman says "why the long face?" The horse replies, "I am Sarah Jessica Parker."

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

What does 2 + 2 equal? 4

23

What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Looks like this is a puts on sunglasses Pair of sunglasses