Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

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What is black and white, and red all over? A mutilated penguin.

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There are two men on a dock. The first man says, "What's your name?" The second man says, "GET OFF!" because he has turrets.

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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knock knock whos there? nobody

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How many Mexicans does it take to cross the border? Don't answer, just think and laugh.

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Q. What's pink and fluffy A. Pink fluff Q. What's blue and fluffy A. Blue fluff

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This joke is stupid, Chuck Testa.

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

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Why couldn't tom concentrate on his homework? Because he was a loaf of bread.

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why does the room smell bad? because there's a dead body under the bed

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

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If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

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Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

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Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

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What's black, white, and can't turn around in a phone booth? A nun with a javelin through her chest.

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Your gay

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Roses are red Violets are blue Peas are green Plums are purple Thieves are black

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What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

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What's funny about anti-jokes? Nothing.

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What's worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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