3 guys walks into a park. Which one was holding the beer? None, all 3 guys were elementary kids

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the penis cross the road? Because a man was humping the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Once i was walking down the street when i saw a homeless man As i leant to give him money he jumped up and stabbed me. Now i don't approach drunk strangers with hangovers

thumb_up thumb_down -24

okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How did Jimmy get into the R movie? He bought a ticket.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

roses are red, violets are blue, your boyfriends thinks i'm hot that's why he dumped you

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What is the best thing the French ever invent The two piece

thumb_up thumb_down -24

so today i took a poop. hehe

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the Mexican jump the border? Because his mom told him the grass was always greener on the other side... She lied.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: What does one man with alzheimer's say to the other man with alzheimer's. A: Purple, because magic doesn't go through chickens.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

1 111111 1 1 11111111111 1 1 111111 1

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Jimmy wanted a bike for Christmas He got cancer instead.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

how many babies does it take to paint a house depends on how hard you throw em

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why does Renee suck at tetris Because she has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why couldn't Helen Keller Drive? Because she was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops