the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

How do you get a dog to stop humping you? Pick him up and suck his dick.

What did the man say to his father? You are not my mom.....

An alcoholic walks into a bar, but then realises he's ruining his family so he calls the rehab

A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender calls animal control.

A man was driving down the road and was swerving, a cop stops him and asks him to walk in a straight line, believing him to be drunk. The man replies "I can't, I've been blind since I was a child."

Go away nothing to see here,. I said go away

what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

(Played Basketball for 15 years) I TOLD YOU I'D QUIT WHEN LeBron Gets A RING

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one does, too.

What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

What did the guy day to the other guy with an afro on his head? You look like a guy with an afro on his head.

How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

A boy walks up to a girl he finds attractive and says "You're body's kick'in! ... i mean...hey, do you know karate?"

What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

Why was 7 afraid of 6? It saw what 6 and 9 do when they're together.

Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

Q: whats worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trashcan? A: 1 dead baby in 10 trashcans

My Mom was strutting down the runway. Then she got trampled by a plane.

Did you hear about the one about the man who walked into the library? He likes reading

Knock Knock Who's There Carly Carly Who Hey I just met you, and this is crazy So here's my number and call me maybe

What was the color of the big lipped, struggling rap artist who violently raped and killed a young woman after robbing a convenience store at gunpoint? Red. He was covered in blood.

SHUT UP JP

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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