rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

Knock knock Who's there Bill Bill who? Bill Thompson

Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are white And Pansies hold hands and skip

anti jokes are really funny

Knock Knock the door's open, come in

What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

What did the bar say to the man? Nothing, bars can't talk

Which way do 5 gay guys walk? Depends on where they're planning to go.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Certainly not to have its motives questioned!

Small Penis.

Honey, it really is such a tragedy that my sense of sight doesn't function properly. I've missed out on many beautiful things in my lifetime.

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

Q: Why didin't fat billy take the last peace of pie? A: cuz he was not hungry

A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

A snail buys a car from a dealership, and then asks the manager if he could paint a large S on the side of the car. The manager agrees, and the snail drives away. From the parking lot, the manager sees the car go straight on to the highway and get hit by a truck. Unfortunately, snails cannot drive.

Why did the blonde jump off the bridge? She was clinically depressed and wanted to end her life

What did one pig say to the other pig while sitting in the bathtub? No thanks I already have a typewriter.

What's the difference between a horse and a house? 1 letter.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

What song did Buddy the elf sing for Santa on his birthday? Happy birthday

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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