Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

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3 guys were caught trespassing in a field and were sent to jail. The cop asked the first guy, "What were you doing in the field? He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop asked the second guy, "What were you doing in the field?" He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop then asked the third guy, "Lemme guess, you were blowing bubbles too? The guy replied, "No silly, I am Bubbles!"

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How many omish people did it take to screw in a lightbulb.

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Drunk, a tweeker and a pot head are walking together when they come upon a huge wall with a large, locked gate in the middle of it. The drunk shouts "lesh shmash it down!" then passes out. The tweeker says "Dude, we should totally take the lock apart and see if there's some kind of mechanism in there holding it together that we can use to build some sort of machine for taking... oh man I gotta crap so bad! Either of you guys gota smoke?" and the pot head says "We should sit here and wait." I didn't say it was a good story

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Q: Why did Timmy cry? A: You would too if you had your arm cut off

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I'm pretty sure you can't throw a fridge...

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

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why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim

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Roses are niggas Violets are niggas I'm lil Wayne niggas rhymes with niggas

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb lady name her kid? Sebastion.

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Feminine hygiene jokes aren't funny. Period

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Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

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Young Billy was arrested today for saying he was going to be a terrorist for Halloween.

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What do you do when you see a black man with half a head? Stop laughing and reload

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You ask your friend if they want to hear a joke when they say yes tell them that thought you had a joke

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Why did the man fall off his bike? He ran into a pile of dead babies.

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What did the sun say to the moon ?? Nothing - they can't speak

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A man walks into a bar and orders 10 shots of tequila. He later goes home drunk and beats his wife. His wife is getting a divorce.

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What did the farmer say to the duck? I don't know, but the duck doesn't give a f.....

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What's the one game that black people are good at? Flashlight tag.

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How do you take a shit?, by taking it to go.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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