what did michael jackson do when i swore at him? nothing he's dead

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Why did the chicken taunt the opposing team? To get to the other side.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

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What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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What did the doctor say to the morbidly obese man? "You should get on a diet. It's a surprise you're even alive for so long with such a bad heart" The next day the man dies while eating celery.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, you have a disease, it's called cancer.

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Why did Timmy mow the lawn? He didn't particularly like the way it looked Why did Timmy fall down the well? He is retarded and thirsty How did Timmy die? He had stage three lung cancer Why cant Timmy drive a car? He has been dead for three years

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A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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why was the boy mad? He had a lot of homework that evening

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whats white and smells like onions? an onion..

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what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

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What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

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An Asian walks into a bar. He has a few drinks, but makes sure not to have to many. He then drives home safely, and enjoys a good nights rest.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

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Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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There was a boy named Johnson. He was a happy boy who had a mother and father who loved. One day he didn't do his homework

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An asian is doing math hw then his dad drives through the door

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when life givs you lemons you say no thank you i dont take food from strangers

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Whats small white and has a hole in it? A powdered Donut

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Q: why does the cat go out of the house by the window A: It doesn't the window is closed

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

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If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops