It's that time of the month again... ...to cut my toenails.

Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

Jesus on the cross promised he would return rite? So three days later he returns in ghost form and leaves. So why people still waiting for him? He returned and left already! (Lack of Moral?): The third coming: this summers blockbuster hit!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

Your mumma's so ugly. Period.

it ain't easy being cheesy Max Harrison

So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

What do you call two black people in the same sleeping bag? A newly married couple on their camping adventure honeymoon.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen. Its was her funeral

* Why is this dog barking? * Because he's a dog, if he were a cat it would meow.

What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

A man attempts to rob a bank. The police are called and the robber is arrested for attempted robbery.

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Why did the girl fall from the tree? Gravity.

Why was the asain studing? Because he had a 59 in math and needed a C to tay on the footbal team.

A Japanese man, a Canadian man and a French woman walk into a bar. They do not converse because they don't speak the same language.

How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

What do you call a fish with no I's Animal cruelty

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? a guy who copies antijokes on ant joke.com

Person 1: knock knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: nobody Person 2: nobody who? Person 1: ............

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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