Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are being pursued by the cops. They run into an old barn for a place to hide. They each hid in a different potato sack. The cops enter the barn, and seeing no one, leave and continue the search somewhere else. The three girls flee the country and give up their life of crime. The cops later go get some donuts.

So a seal walks into a club...

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

What's black and white and red all over? A Giant Panda that has been killed by poachers.

a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

Whats black, white, and huge? The world if you are a dog.

Why did the baby cross the street? It was stapled to the chicken

What does a blonde's vagina taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage

Rick Perry.

Why did the fat black guy fail his eye exam? He's blind.

Why did the chicken cross the road? A manufacturing defect in the chain link fence released several chickens who are now freely roaming the area.

If Life gives you melons, then I think your dislexic

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a skank.

Boy: Hey, guess who likes you. Girl: Who? Boy: NOBODY!!!!!!!!

If I have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, we both have the same monetary value.

The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

What do dead babies and trash both have in common? They're both in my dumpster.

Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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