A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

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Q:Which way do gay people walk? A:In One Direction

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

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Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

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Two men are walking. The first one ask "what time is it?". They die.

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What is the difference between a joke and an antijoke? An antijoke does not have a punch line.

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How do you make a black man cry? Kill his family

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What's black and white and red all over? A bleeding penguin.

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How do you tie your shoes underwater? In a submarine

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Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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If I have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, we both have the same monetary value.

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Kim Kardashian.

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Q- why are anti-jokes funny? A- cuz

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why did the chicken cross the road? cause it can bitch.

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What is a cow's favorite place to go? The slaughterhouse.

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Why couldn't Peter climb the tree? Because he's a fish.

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whats worse than one bee sting... two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings... the holocaust whats worse than the holocaust... three bee stings

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What did the pauper want for Christmas? Money

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American healthcare.

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A man walks into a bar. The bar tender asks him "why the long face?" He replies "Because I'm a horse, you jackass".

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind

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A Jew, an Atheist, and a Muslim walk into a bar. They each drink a bottle, have a conversation, and leave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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