Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It lost it's grip on the branch and was unable to break it's fall before reaching the ground.

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A musician without any music walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Who do you think you are, a hobbit?" The musician without any music says,"yeah" and turns into a hobbit

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Take away his glass of water.

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what did one elephant say to the other one? nothing silly elepehants dont talk

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Have ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither has she.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Chet. Chet who? I probably shouldn't be giving you my name, just get in the fucking van...

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I would tell you a joke about a blunt pencil but it's pointless

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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I never made a mistake. I thought i did once but i was mistaken

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Calling your penis a chose because it's small and fat.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it accidentally got out of it's pen. the farmer got very mad at the chicken for getting out, and very vicous-like, yelled at the chicken, causing it to get scared, and run to the other side. and that, is why the chicken crossed the road.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a buddhist monk walk into a bar. The bartender says " What are you drinking?"

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Q: Why didn't i save my work? A: Because i didn't do any work?

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"MR PLATT!!!!!!" "Yeah?" "Telephone for you sir." "Oh, cheers Tony."

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a horse is a horse. of course of course....unless its a cow

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Roses are Red, Violets are not blue they are violet, nothing rhymes with this, I give up

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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Frontbut-

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Your a christain on a lovely vacation with your family a querr waalks by. What do you do? you push the queer of the edge.

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A woman has sex with an Asian man, then a white man, and then a black man. She chooses to be in a relationship with the black man because he is prepared for the responsibilities of a relationship and the other two men, though both are well endowed, are not ready.

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Boy: Hey girl see these arms? They are just dying to be wrapped around you! She stabs him dead End of story

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Friends are like trees, they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Why are stand up comedians called stand up comedians? Because they are standing up while telling jokes, dumby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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